As a psychologist, I have seen a number of individuals over
the years who suffer from a condition called “Self-Destructive Personality
Disorder” (a disorder often hidden by depression, anxiety, or other personality disorders). It involves a pattern of behavior where, as a
person begins to experience success, they unconsciously self-sabotage that
success and return to a particular base-line of pain, because that is what they
are used to.
Organizations, even nations, can be affected by this
condition too. I believe the United
States suffers from this diagnosis. Over
and over again we experience progress like we have in these recent years, with
returning to 5 ½ years of continuous economic expansion, doubling the stock
market, driving unemployment down with 10 million new jobs, providing medical
care to millions previously denied, investing in infrastructure long overdue,
radically driving down the national deficit, ending wars, and the like, and
then by pulling back in fear, we threaten the progress that has been made. (This happened, you may recall, after the Clinton
administration put our country back on balanced budgets, which was immediately
erased by the next administration).
Once again we seem to be turning back the other way by
electing officials that seek less-than-informed ways to solve our national
problems - taking food away from the hungry, establishing laws that keep people
from voting, withdrawing funding to educate our young people, denying support
to the suffering sick, promoting the shift of welfare for the poor to welfare
for the wealthy, advancing abortions by withdrawing women’s and men’s access to
family planning clinics, and digging their heals in to make sure we retreat once
again back toward a country where the rich and powerful continue to expand
their privilege on the backs of the disadvantaged.
Don’t get me wrong. I
support republicans who are caring human beings, yet am still disappointed in
the lack of wisdom and denial by many that are not able to see how their fear sets back
the progress we’ve worked so hard to achieve.
It has always been the liberals who have advanced our society - to grant
women the right to vote, to fight for minorities and the poor, end segregation,
care for the elderly, protect the environment, etc. But conservatives retreating to fear expressed
as attack on do-gooders is a common symptom of low self-esteem gone awry.
We’ll see what happens in the 2016 elections. Will we continue the regression back to the
more painful past, or re-gear to move ahead again?
Until our nation is cured from its Self-Destructive
Personality Disorder (the cure of which comes through loving the hurting, just
as it does in the therapist’s office), the sea-saw effect will continue. It all depends on when we reach the point of
wanting to end the pain, or continue to return to it out of familiarity and
fear of moving on to solutions that require change and letting someone else
have some good ideas.
Our nation, and the people in it, deserve to be loved, and
if we can risk to move in that direction, we will cure the illness that leaves
so many destitute, hungry, ill, homeless, unemployed, and in despair.
Since a 3rd grader cannot understand the
experience of a 6th grader, those who know how to love must take the lead, not with criticism, but by example. Let
us resist the temptation to attack, and accept the opportunity to support and relieve
the fears of those who need our love in order to come home to decency and
respect. I invite all of us to be a part
of the solution that heals all wounds – a compassion and effort to use our
blessings to bless others - and end the cycle of self-destruction.
