Confessions of a Growing Human Being

January 2, 2021

There was a session in my personal therapy back in the 80’s which became transformative – it changed the trajectory of my life forever.

 

The dynamic moment occurred in the treatment of my depression, where my therapist pointed out that unless I left my mother behind, I would never recover.

 

This was frightening to me.  It was also liberating for me.  I realized that day that I had been holding myself back from being happy because my mother was stuck in her own depression, and I did not want to move on and abandon her without hope.  After all, I thought, I was one of the few people who could help her.  I had given her many suggestions, ideas, insights, support, and truth-telling from my point of view – yet she would not grab onto any of it.  I was maintaining my own depression by thinking there must be something more I could do to release her from hers, and therefore waiting for her to come along on my journey to happiness.

 

The truth became clear that day.  I could not change her.  I could not rescue her.   I could not wait for her. I could not save her.  If and when she was ready for change, she had to invest in herself.  She was the only one who had the power to free herself.  I was waiting no more.

 

That day, through the tears, I let go, and I began to recover.

 

I feel like I am at another crossroads, as we enter into a new era of 2021.  I spent much of last year wanting to free my friends from the darkness, from being fooled, from abandoning their usual kindness and caring and investing in deceit, cruelty, and denial.  I wanted to welcome them back to the greatness I know was within them.  I wanted them to re-join that land of love and reason and sanity.

 

It’s hard to let go of friends.  I had created a comfortable blanket of community that felt safe.  Moving ahead into deeper joy, I have realized, may mean leaving behind those who are not ready yet for more personal joy in their own lives.  I can’t wait for them to get ready, to come along, to be ready when I am ready.   We’re ready in our own time.

 

And so today, I let go. I feel the same pain I did when I said good-bye to trapping myself waiting for my mom to be ready to come along, to return to the land of love where joy existed, where the future was created, where loving communion in relationship was, where peace was waiting for us to embrace.

 

I have built a tribe of positive and growing people around me.  We will march into the future together, hand-in-hand, looking for and creating what’s good.  I will not be waiting for those whose timing is different than mine.  Everyone has his or her own time.  I will not stop loving them.  I will still stop relating to them.  I will not stop welcoming them into my life.

 

But I will no longer wait for them to catch up.  I will love them the way they are, and wish them the best, and when they are ready and wanting to come along to the land of bliss, where fear, anger, blaming, discrimination, racism, hatred, scarcity, and needing to win by making others lose, does not exist, they will be received in my embrace.

 

So let me state this:  I believe Black Lives Matter (because they do).  I believe All Lives Matter (because they do).  I believe in the goodness of our police (super-servants!).  I believe that police officers, like any of us, should receive the gift of confrontation with compassion and guidance when they are hurting others.  I believe we can save our planet even while many others seem to lack awareness of how they are destroying it.  I will care for the sick that others are making ill. I will encourage the downtrodden, support those wanting not to go it alone, and love those open to receiving my love. 

 

I will see and support the lovers that notice how important their gifts and talents are to others who are in need.  I celebrate generosity and empathy, dedication, and service to humanity.

 

I believe Biden will work with diligence to unify us as a country, and many of us will join him because cooperating feels better than fighting.  There will be many who will not join this movement, and that is their right.  I will respect their need for more lessons to find out their fears are unfounded, and that rejecting and judging others will not get them what they need. I will not attack them, berate them, or expect them to be someone they’re not.

 

I let go of the hurts I have caused others this past year, knowing love has always been my intent, even though at times poorly expressed.  I let go of those who have rejected me.  I will not demand they understand me.  And I will not demand they explain themselves so I can understand them.  I will share with those who like to share.  I will forgive others whether they forgive me or not.  I will respectfully stand for truth when others don’t care.

 

I know who I am.  I know I am love.  I know I am growing and imperfect.  I know I make mistakes, and forgive myself for them.  I will not try to win people over to a better life, although I will remain open to supporting them when they are ready for it.

 

I judge no one.  I respect everyone, especially those I do not understand or who do not care about me.  We're all on our own path.  Just as I accept my own failings, I accept the failings of others as well.  I do not take their opinions personally.  I know when they see me clearly and when they don’t.  They are not here to please me.  I am here to own with honesty the wholeness of who I am, with or without their approval.  

 

I am ready to move on.  I join with enthusiasm those who seek love, fairness, integrity, respect, honesty, compassion, and truth.  I am raising the level of vibration of my tribe.  Some will drop out.  New ones will join.

 

I release you from needing to please me.  I take responsibility for my own mission, behaviors, and feelings.   I will stand up when I see people hurting others, but I will reject no one.  I am one with all, not better than or worse than anyone.  I choose happiness, and link arms with all who want to walk this path with me.

 

I love you, and that will never change.  My heart has grown bigger this year.  And it will grow bigger yet in the year to come.  I hope many of you will join me.  The journey can be easier if we trek it together.  

Love,

David

Clear Thinking Simplified on a COVID-19 Pandemic in America

There will be many postmortems by statisticians wiser than me in the near future, but the international team of researchers at worldometers.info has demonstrated extraordinary accuracy in their calculations.

They have estimated that if our leadership had taken COVID-19 seriously, as did the informed leaders of counties like New Zealand, South Korea, etc., U.S. deaths would likely have been limited to around 1,500. A British study confirmed similar numbers, indicating that if social distancing had started just two weeks earlier, 90% of American lives lost could have been saved. At the time, only 28,000 Americans had died. https://www.express.co.uk/news/science/1269742/coronavirus-update-donald-trump-us-death-toll-covid-19-pandemic

Let's give our president the benefit of the doubt, and say worldometers and the Brit researchers were way off. Let's double or triple the worldometers estimate to make sure there is no bias against Mr. Trump. In fact, let's multiply that estimate by 10 ! In that case, an astonishing 15,000 Americans would have been lost to the virus no matter what any of our leaders did.

However, there were some complications. Setting us up to be unprepared by eliminating carefully constructed prevention measures installed by the previous administration, and by firing our best and brightest pandemic medical professionals more than 3 years ago, and then delaying action by 4 months after the first warning, as well as the fact that Mr. Trump has STILL not engaged in successful practices of other victorious countries, has given us a death toll that now exceeds 120,000.

If we assume that 15,000 may have died anyway, that leaves only about 105,000 deaths for which Trump could be held personally responsible for acting in his own self-interest instead of the country's. That amount exceeds all American lives lost in the Korean War, the Iraq Wars, and the War in Afghanistan put together. (The current death rate is likely to double before this is over. If that becomes true, Trump could singlehandedly have accomplished the largest massacre of Americans since the Civil War, nearly outpacing all the battle deaths of WWII. (291,557) )

If you were an author making up a fictional tale, no one would believe this was possible, and yet here we are - all an astonishing consequence of ill-motivated and mis-directed decision-making.

But that's not all. The economic consequences of Trump's non-action and mis-action have been unprecedented in the history of our country, projected to expand to a cost of $16 Trillion by the CBO as reported by Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/shaharziv/2020/06/02/coronavirus-pandemic-will-cost-us-economy-8-trillion/#1da8daa115e4 ) About $3 Trillion that has already been allocated by Congress to bandaid the mess, with much more to come. (The $3 Trillion amounts to an extra $23,809 per family already, without interest. Guess who will be asked to pay for that?)

In earlier years, Trump depended on his dad to bail out his business failures. We already know of 100's of millions of dollars either given to or laundered by Trump through his businesses to siphon money from his dad, and this is before any disclosure of his tax returns. We also know that Trump has lost as much as $1 Billion in a single year as a businessman (1995). https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2019/05/07/us/politics/donald-trump-taxes.html It's ironic, isn't it, that some people thought he would make a good president because of of his business 'success'?

His dad would not have enough money to bail him out this time, but he has something better - the taxpayers of the United States. Only the United States of America has enough money to bail him out this time. Yes, this time, you and I are rescuing him financially. Not sure any of us knew what were were signing up for there.

Astonishingly, still about 40% of Americans are still thinking about re-electing him this fall. Now that's a story no publishing company would think was sellable.

Leadership to Prevent COVID-19 in the United States and Two Other Countries

I'm guessing someone's going want to react to this politically. Please don't do that. Look at this from the perspective of leadership, not politics. 

Here is a fact-checked timeline of the first 6 months of the U.S. response to COVID-19 spread in the United States. Some references are made to several countries who made different choices and how they fared. "Leader" refers to a U.S. national leader. When you connect the dots, how do you evaluate the U.S. leadership? Remember, focus on leadership choices, not personalities.

2018: Leader eliminates Pandemic Unit of the National Security Council in the Spring of 2018, not liking the report from its director the day before that the U.S. is not prepared for a pandemic. (see former directors and/or homeland security advisors Timothy Ziemer. Tom Basset, Luciana Borio)

2019: U.S. Leader fires the epidemiologists Bao-Ping Zhu and Dr. Linda Quick, assigned overseas to follow possible pandemics in China, delaying America's response to COVOD-19 by two months or more. https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-coronavirus-china-cdc-exclusiv/exclusive-u-s-axed-cdc-expert-job-in-china-months-before-virus-outbreak-idUSKBN21910S

In early November 2019, Intelligence officials warn  Leader that a virus spreading in China could have "cataclysmic" impact on the U.S. Leader ignores.

In early January, 2020, Leader begins getting daily briefings on the spreading virus and was urged to take action before it was too late. Leader continues to be non-responsive. https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/frontline/article/i-feel-anguished-stephen-morrison-warned-covid-19-coronavirus-pandemic-threat/

Jan 21, 2020. First known case in U.S. World Health Organization (WHO), reports virus risk globally is high. South Korea also reports first case

Jan 22, 2020. After 3 months of warnings without any action taken, Leader reports: "We have it under control. It's going to be just fine." 

January 30th: WHO declares virus a global health emergency. Leader holds a campaign rally in IA.  Leader blocks travel from China, not realizing the virus already has a foothold in the US.

Feb 2nd: Leader comments on Fox News: "We've pretty much shut it down."

Feb 3: New Zealand begins restrictions to slow virus they know is coming, the first case of which doesn't actually appear for another 25 days.

Feb 4th. Leader: "We have a very small number in the country right now with it...we're in very good shape."

Feb 5th. Two weeks after the first infection, South Korea flattens the curve. Even though the US and South Korea reported their first case the same day, South Korea responded immediately. Now 4 months behind South Korea, on May 18, the U.S.has still not implemented the successful strategies of South Korea.  

February 14, 2020:  Leader fights to reduce CDC budget by $693 million including funding to "emerging infectious disease," and "public health preparedness and response". http://thenationshealth.aphapublications.org/content/50/2/1.2

Feb 24. Leader comments: "the Coronavirus is very much under control in the USA. The stock market is starting to look very good to me."

Feb 25th: CDC warns Leader that the "virus was not contained and would grow into a pandemic." https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/may/14/where-is-the-cdc-trump-covid-19-pandemic

Feb 26th: Contrary to the warnings of his medical advisors, Leader comments "Cases in the US is going to be down, close to zero."

Feb 27: Leader: "One day, like a miracle, it's going to disappear."

Feb 28th. Leader calls the threat of the virus an expanded "democratic hoax."

Feb 28th. New Zealand reports first COVID-19 case.

March 4th. Leader blames predecessor for the crisis, not mentioning it was he himself who shut down many of predecessor's initiatives to prevent and prepare for this event.

On March 6th, Leader proclaims "Anybody that wants a test can get a test." (On May 18th, the date of this writing, there are still not tests available for the average citizen unless they have COIV-19 symptoms. Note: most new cases cases are spread by those without symptoms.)

March 9th: After many epidemiologists in the US, as well as his Intelligence resources that gave Leader 4 months warning, (and being briefed daily for two months), Leader still states, "This blindsided the world."

March 13th: Now, 6 -8 weeks behind in responding to dally warnings, when asked about his slow response, Leader says "I don't take responsibility at all."  That week, the number of new cases was doubling every 3 days.

March 14: 2,826 cases

March 25. Four weeks after the 1st case, New Zealand goes on national lockdown. four days before it has it's first death.

April 5th. After 2 weeks of national lockdown, New Zealand peaks, and curve not only flattens, but declines rapidly. Due measures taken, South Korea has flattened curve in two weeks; New Zealand in 6 weeks. Fifteen weeks after 1st case, still no lockdown in U.S., starting to level at 22,000 new cases a day.

April 14, 2020, Much to the concern of international leaders and American scientists, Leader pulls out of major funding of the W.H.O., the organization depended on world-wide for pandemic control.

April 14: 609,240 cases

April 14: Leader shown to be connected with promoting Protests against CDC guidelines through Michigan Free Fund (Devos Funded), Operation Gridlock, Freedom Works (Koch Bros). Stephen Moore, one of the major organizers of Protests nation-wide, appointed to Leader's 'Reopen America' Council. (NYT, The Daily, Apr, 22, 2020).

April 17: Desparate for economic recovery, and Ignoring his own criteria (and that of medical professionals), Leader promotes "opening" of three States on twitter. https://www.whitehouse.gov/openingamerica/

April 22: The CDC, confirms again that Leader has repeatedly stopped them from accurately reporting vital pandemic information, as well as the recommendations they felt responsible to share with the public.

May 15 - 18: Forty eight states relax stay-at-home orders with national nation-wide infectious finally starting to flatten. Although 18 states have flattened the curve, only in 9 are cases falling: MN, IA, IL, TN, FL AK, AL. States with the fastest rising cases remain South Dakota, Arkansas, Maine, North Carolina, Texas, and Wyoming. (IHME).

May 18: 1,549,359 cases

****

In the graph below (click to enlarge), it can be seen South Korea, the first nation to react quickly, flattened the curve in two weeks.  It increased a bit after "opening the country", but they have regained control and cases are falling significantly.  New Zealand responded the most quickly, engaging a national shutdown before they had the first death. This gave them one of the best turnouts of any country in the world. By contrast, and disappointingly, the U.S. is doing by far the worst of any country in managing the virus.

The Special Challenge of Accountability

This is for leaders and those interested in ethics.  The temptation will be to turn this into something political.  Don’t.  It’s a non-partisan question that has nothing to do with either Republicans or Democrats.  It’s about personal conduct and abdication of responsibility as a human being and an honored national leader.

What do we say about a president, any president, no matter what the party, who, briefed by the WHO of a cataclysmic virus spreading in China in November, which became a daily briefing in January, and who, even two months after that, muzzles publically the nation’s leading expert on viruses from sharing the truth, along the way telling us “We’re very close to a vaccine” (Feb 25),  “It will disappear like a miracle” (Feb 27), “It will go away” (Mar 10), and who, in addition, delayed social distancing for weeks, role models how not to follow the CDC advice of wearing masks in public, and in the same week the surgeon general proclaims is our “pearl harbor” week, (and the same day we experienced the most deaths in the United States to date), continues to tell us we are “seeing a light at the end of the tunnel” ?

You, who are supervisors of others, how would you hold such an employee accountable, knowing his negligence was responsible for thousands of current and future deaths, more, in fact, than we lost in the terrorist attack in the U.S. on 911, and far more than just “shooting someone on Fifth Avenue.”?

I want to emphasize, I do not want to hear any blaming of Mr. Trump, who is doing the best he can with the ability he has.  And, I am still interested in hearing how such a person with these behaviors, no matter who he worked for, should be held accountable?

This is a sticky situation, and perhaps difficult to answer objectively, in light of current social pressures to politicize.  Yet, at the same time, we remember in the past we have sanctioned both a Democratic president for trying to conceal having sex with a subordinate near the oval office (and his honoring of a request by Congress to appear and explain it), and a Republican president for breaking and entering the Watergate Building (also in which no one died). 

So, let’s focus.  I am posing two questions:

(1)  Is it appropriate a person who exhibits such actions described, be held accountable for them?  

(2)  How could this be done given his political position, and immunity granted by the United States Senate to do anything he wants?

Insights, please?

Understanding Our Differences from a Quantum Perspective

Have you ever wondered why someone gets caught up in beliefs that have no bearing or relationship to reality? Why they can’t see the obvious? Why they are so averse to considering facts?

Remembering this may help. We cannot make leaps in vibrational level. And, we can only be open to that which approximates our vibration. David Hawkin’s (see Power vs. Force) vibrational scale is helpful here. If you are vibrating as a level, say, of 350, and the person you’re talking to is vibrating at 200, the other person will not have the capacity to understand the concepts you see. It’s out of their vibrational range.

Similarly, views that they hold may make no sense to you because they are not a vibrational match to where you are.

Those focused on compassion, honesty and integrity are seen, by those who fear reality, as crazy. Those focused on fear, dishonesty, and needing to be right, not only cannot relate to concepts of caring, reason, or being their ‘brother’s keeper’; it is beyond their comprehension. They see people as separate, and divide individuals/groups into categories of folks worth caring about or not caring about.

If you can see we are all one, all equal in value, and that love is our source, our destiny, and our way of life, the idea of taking from the poor and giving to the rich, taking food supplies away from hungry people, or ignoring the needs of the homeless or desperate, is abhorrent to you, but seems perfectly normal to folks vibrating at a level of separateness.

So when you are frustrated that someone does not see how they are hurting others or seem to lack caring of the vulnerable, know they are not bad people, they are simply not capable of seeing what you see.

Many Young People Looking for Integrity in Religion

E. Jean Carroll recently revealed her story (with corroboration) of being raped by President Trump.  There are at least 15 others who have the same experience, namely, Jessica Leeds, Kristin Anderson, Jill Harth, Cathy Heller, Temple Taggart McDowell, Karena Virginia, Melinda McGillivray, Rachel Crooks, Natasha Stoynoff, Jessica Drake, Ninni Laaksonen, Summer Zervos, Juliet Huddy, Alva Johnson, and Cassandra Searles, plus another 22 reporting being sexually harassed by him, in keeping with how he describes his own behavior of preying on women.

Carroll’s account is not pretty, and has been classified in the legal system as “rape.” 

“He lunges at me, pushes me against the wall, hitting my head quite badly, and puts his mouth against my lips. I am so shocked I shove him back... He seizes both my arms and pushes me up against the wall a second time, and, as I become aware of how large he is, he holds me against the wall with his shoulder and jams his hand under my coat dress and pulls down my tights.  The next moment, still wearing correct business attire, shirt, tie, suit jacket, overcoat, he opens the overcoat, unzips his pants, and, forcing his fingers around my private area, thrusts his penis halfway — or completely, I’m not certain — inside me.” 

The support of the Christian right for this behavior, along with general disrespect, abuse, and cover-up in so many other areas, is a example of why religion is being abandoned by our young people. Tessa Landrum reports in a recent article in Kentucky Today, that many of her generation (Gen Z) are finding they want no part of the hypocrisy and lack of integrity demonstrated by many religious positions that promote assaults on women, blacks, LGBTQs, immigrants, those of other faiths, and the poor.  

This gives me hope that the newer generations will not put up with ‘good old boys’ mentality, but rather seek honest and genuine relationships, both personally and professionally, supported by a recognition that true spirituality means we treat each other with respect as equals.

An Opportunity to Make a Difference

After inheriting an un-stoppable accelerating economy, Mr. Trump, in his first 2 1/2 years, has managed to slow job growth by 25%, and slowed    S & P 500 growth by 2/3. 

Pretending China is paying for his tariffs (they aren't - Americans companies pay China to buy the more expensive items), the tariffs are now costing Americans (through the purchasing of price-inflated products) about $3.4 billion a month.

A record number of farmers are going out of business. After some taking as much as a 50% hit on their products, and the elimination of many world markets, tens of Billions of dollars are being paid to farmers from our Treasury to try to keep them afloat from our leader-created mess.

Violence has increase by 226% on average in the communities Trump has held his rallies inciting hate. American terrorists quote Trump as their inspiration for mass murders.

We continue to experience and encourage 270 times the number of shooting deaths by Americans each week as our soldiers experience on battlefields worldwide. Our conservative leaders in Washington do nothing to stop this (although they often offer 'thoughts and prayers' - actually, do you think they really pray?)

Seven Million Americans lost their health coverage since Mr. Trump started issuing his "executive orders."

Inheriting a national deficit that had been cut in half by the previous administration ($1.2 Trillion --> $487 Billion), Trump doubled it back to the Great Recession levels in less than one year.

While 222 countries around the world are taking responsibility to address climate change, the leader of our country denies and accelerates climate change with policies to restrict funding to green energy and increasing investments into green-house-gas-producing energy sources headed by his donors.

He has successfully encouraged policies all over the country to enslave more women to life-long unwanted child-rearing and condemn them to poverty by restricting family planning resources.

Under the guise of protecting our country, he has caged and tortured thousands of refugees seeking protection from life threatening conditions for their families (allowing some to die), and kidnapped hundreds of children from foreign families who will never again have the chance to be reunited with their parents.

I know this is a free country, and we get to support this type of treatment of human beings and of the planet if we choose to, but in my mind, this is not what freedom is for.

Freedom is for helping others get free, for protecting people from many types of attacks and assaults, and nurturing human beings through compassion, respect, and through financial assistance from the haves to the have-nots.

With privilege comes responsibility. I urge all of us to take responsibility to foster the values we hold dear and are at the foundation of our country. We do not have to become the monsters of the world and participate in destroying both it and human dignity.

The answer is a return to love. We are capable of it. We can work for it. We can choose it. 

Let's do it! :-)